Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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