I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize