Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian