remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
