so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
