But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Randomize
