You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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