he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Will exercising make me less horny?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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