guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
