She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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