I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize