My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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