Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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