theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
