he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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