I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
found the other keg... it's in the tree
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
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Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
My liver just had a heart attack.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
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Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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