we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
