we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
