Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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