is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize