He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
