I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
