On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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