Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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