I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
