Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
