I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
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And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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