So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize