have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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