so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Randomize
