woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.