Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy

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(309): View more from Illinois

I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.

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(509): View more from Washington

I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(914): View more from New York

vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable

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(931): View more from Tennessee

everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend

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(804): View more from Virginia

Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.

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(312): View more from Illinois

I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool

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(507): View more from Minnesota

It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.

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