either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better