i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Drunk is not a location!
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
