Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
