I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
