like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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