you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
