I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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