im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
