his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
