we have officially lost it.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
