We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
id be glad to
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
