ADVERTISEMENT

• (407): View more from Florida

  Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.

  Fav 9 3381 1012

  share tweet
  

• (530): View more from California

  I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.

  Fav 13 5518 1473

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (913): View more from Kansas

  Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays

  Fav 3 1157 1332

  share tweet
  

• (239): View more from Florida

  I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.

  Fav 7 1995 1008

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (+66): View more from Thailand

  Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.

  Fav 10 2626 998

  share tweet
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke

  Fav 1 686 1490

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (512): View more from Texas

  I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted

  Fav 4 1191 658

  share tweet
  

• (319): View more from Iowa

  More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.

  Fav 2 1249 768

  share tweet
  

• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!

  Fav 3 904 650

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (248): View more from Michigan

  You can't just leave with hair like that

  Fav 2 725 608

  share tweet
  

• (425): View more from Washington

  I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later

  Fav 3 1453 578

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.

  (779): View more from Illinois

  YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.

  Fav 4 697 914

  share tweet
  

• (806): View more from Texas

  Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car

  Fav 4 434 932

  share tweet
  

• (585): View more from New York

  You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder

  Fav 5 552 313

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (210): View more from Texas

  Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.

  Fav 1 43 10

  share tweet
  

Randomize