matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
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Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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