Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.