Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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