It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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