Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
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Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
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At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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