Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Let's paint friendship bongs
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
