someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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