I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
